Be timely

I was reminded about something very important last night as I was hanging out with Brahmin and his friends in a suburb outside of Boston. We were chilling out and he had this friend, who I will call Craig.

Craig would say things during the course of the conversation that were clearly originating from an authentic source, were sometimes spot-on and funny, but more important, something spontaneous, real, and timely.

There was another friend who I will call James, who was the opposite. He was clearly in his head, my guess being as a reaction to so much funny and timely authentic shit being tossed around (which can be intimidating, coming from personal experience). So, he was coming up with stuff that was probably as funny or more so, but it was delivered too late.

We almost never laughed at or even noticed James's stuff, but always laughed at Craig's stuff.

What's the point? Well, the obvious one is "don't get into your head", because it's like keeping the e-brake engaged while you're racing.

However, the point I want to make is this: a timely and relevant thing (joke, topic, conversation thread) is always superior to a untimely and relevant thing. What does this mean? For guys who are waiting for someone to stop talking so they can say funny shit to get that all-wonderful reaction, STOP. Not only is it inauthentic (as in not originating from your core, and not designed to amuse yourself, but to amuse others), but it just doesn't WORK in the sense of getting the desired reactions.

I would even say this: if, while talking to someone, and halfway through them talking, you come up with a funny joke or totally relevant anecdote, fact, etc., DROP IT, and come up with something else that's relevant when he/she finishes talking. It helps you strengthen your ability to come up with authentic things, stay out of your head, appreciate AND LISTEN TO what the other person has to say, and even to get a better reaction, if that's all you care about.